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UAAP Cheerdance Competition 2008: Post-Mortem
Mon, Sep 8, 2008 by Pandaemonaeon
A day after the scalper-ruined Ateneo/La Salle match-up (which was a huge letdown for the predominantly lopsided pace just as much as its lack of Georgina Wilson) we are treated to yet another scalper-ruined spectacle in the 2008 UAAP Cheerdance Competition. This event is notable for giving cheerdancers a platform to strut their wares and settle year-long disputes and insecurities as opposed to being relegated as mere morale boosters during halftime or in the piping hot bleachers.
While the event existed as early as the mid-90s, it's only until 2000 when multinational company Nestle introduced the annual event to millions of viewers. Gigantic styrofoam ice cream cups and glittered letterings have been a staple on each school's performance at the behest of the sponsor's demand for the incorporation of products into their routine in a determined attempt to push the boundaries of overt advertising, a title that Solar has wrested since then with their unforgivable coverage of the recent Beijing Olympics.
After 8 years in the helm, Samsung got their turn and while many shuddered at the thought of carrying 3D cutouts of Plasma TV sets and refrigerators, the Korean consortium was a tad merciful deciding that a short, three-piece dance routine would suffice but at the price of adding extended segments such as a "Dream Team" and integration of Samsung and their respective slogans in the middle of random statements.
Being the perennial journalists that we are, securing tickets were of little problem to our team, allowing The 15th Parallel to successfully document the preceedings. Granted we were unable to bring our famed Nikon DLSR camera and silver-plated Manfrotto tripod (known as the 21st parallel) into the premises as a result of incompetent guards who were not the least bit familiar with our popular inter-web page but what ultimately matters is that we were able to cover it and that alone is a cause for jubilation!
The Animo Squad (DLSU)
The Skinny: Eager to avenge their blunder from last year (which expectedly became an internet meme), the DLSU Pep Squad repackaged their roster as the "Animo Squad", incorporating members from separate dance guilds and retaining only 6 from their previous core as well as eschewing their trademark skimpy outfits in favor of an Ateneo-style preppy look. Will this change prove successful? They think so!
Review: The Animo Squad makes their way to the arena with oversized letters in tow. Unfortunately their dark green Bioman costume makes them a bit hard to see in the new Samsung-themed blue-colored matting. It appears that they forgot to send their Samsung dancers ahead either, who now awkwardly run in front but are promptly asked to depart. Things are not looking god for them. Thankfully, they only brought 4 letters.
Arrow formation, ice-skating pantomime spot, split-leg bunny hops, aerobic excercise, oh look they're doing the male pep squad floor humping too. We get some random shots of the DLSU crowd who are mostly disappointed; even the mom is clapping her balloons with the enthusiasm of a nauseated Somalian.
Fun Fact: Select portions of the Animo Squad's Bioman starter kit costume were colored white which makes those parts the only visible areas from afar because of the unintentional camouflage. Among the parts with such color scheme? The girl's crotches.
Salinggawi Dance Troupe (UST)
The Skinny: Even if you don't care about cheerdancing, chances are you're well aware of UST's reputation in this field, usually by way of flame wars perpetuated by their following against the equally rabid supporters of UP, where they needlessly argue about who has the better pyramids and originality, which eventually segues into who produces better students and PACUCOA accreditation. Anyway, now where were we? Ah, the Salinggawi Dance Troupe. I heard they're great!
Review: A few basket tosses, rolling flips and the return of the matrix albeit in a shorter, less gimmicky way. This is followed by the female dancers falling into a supine position as their male counterparts sashay over and around them in quite possibly the most limpwristed sequence I've seen in a while. Whether or not the male cheerdancers are actually limpwristed is a different topic altogether.
Also worth mentioning was the huge UST banner they propped up in the middle of their routine that has a tiger head on top. But not just any tiger head; it's eyes light up! Impressive! If that pun was intentional, they get bonus points. If not, consider it an oversight.
Fun Fact: No Power Rangers outfit for UST this year, instead they took the NU halftime cheering squad costume and spruced it up. No shit.
UP Pep (UP)
The Skinny: From one cheerdance competition juggernaut to another, the UP Pep Squad has been a constant in this field since it's inception, either winning the title itself or at worst, a top 3 finish. Like UST, they are also backed by a strong contingent willing to unleash a torrent of vitriol to anyone who dare malign their beloved squad who in case you're not aware, are capable of anything and everything from intricate tosses to walking on water. They're that damn good, or at least that's what they told me, and I'm inclined to agree since I'm afraid to be called names.
Review: The pep squad are wearing a really weird get-up. It looks like your typical rhythmic gymnastics full body stocking suit with a banana hammock and tattered skirt layer on top. If I have to make a comparison that makes sense it would be Robin wearing a skirt - literally. The men and women also sport mohawks and cropped do's respectively.
A few minutes into the contest and we have a ton of fuck-ups so far with most of their members unable to complete tosses and other sequences. In addition to the canned music, Benguet province post-rock sound clips also manages to find its way into their routine, keeping up with UP's consistent theme of being "artistic" that also hounded the smash-hit opening ceremonies. The performance is capped off by a flesh-colored undie-wearing guy doing the Oblation pose as indentations of his rib cage protrudes from his ample chest.
Fun Fact: UP Pep member Frances Fleta is the recipient of the "Samsung Stunner" award. While it does sound like a wrestling move, it's actually a special distinction and prize (what appears to be a Samsung F700) awarded to the best looking cheerdancer. Frances accepts the prize coyly, like a Japanese schoolgirl asking Michael Phelps for an autograph. Very cute, I must say.
The "Blazing Tamaraws" (FEU)
The Skinny: After UST and UP, FEU is the only other squad seriously considered a threat to the "Big Two" which is quite unfair to the Morayta-based outfit considering that they've finished no worse than 3rd since it's inception. Nevertheless, with a whopping 17 rookies in their team this year, the odds are stacked against FEU although they're so confident they decided to brand this incarnation as the "Blazing Tamaraws". Sheer confidence or bats in the belfry insanity? You be the judge.
Review: The Tamaraws erect a spiffy-looking inferno backdrop from behind that are color-coordinated to their fiery outfits reminiscent of an anorexic Bam Bam Bigelow. They even have yellow red handkerchiefs; hopefully it creates the desired visual effect unlike in the UP opening when the "fire people" looked like bats more than anything. Speaking of UP, their guys are also sporting mohawks. Am I missing something?
Near the end of the routine, the Tamaraws pep squad unveil a banner that reads "Blazing Tamaraws" which coincide with the flame theme although I still have no idea what that has to do with a tamaraw or their school colors. Maybe a reference to the returning Mac Baracael who blazed quickly to recovery? Yeah, that sort of makes sense.
Fun Fact: FEU's courtside reporter had trouble keeping up with the "bad American accent" convention near the end of the program.
NU Bulldogs Pep (NU)
The Skinny: The doormats of UAAP men's basketball continue the tradition even in the CDC, finishing dead last each and every year. The spin doctors claim that having an intact line-up (compared to last year when 7 members were rendered ineligible) and new coaching will be the wake up call that they sorely need, but The 15th Parallel disagrees. Our crystal ball tells us that the results will not be any different; the "crystal ball" being the live recording that is.
Review: Taking a page out of what made La Salle famous, NU opens with the "letter" routine (with opposite sides displaying NATIONAL and BULLDOGS respectively) and thankfully no one fucked up.
Like Adamson, they're also going for a no-nonsense approach, doing away with dancing and going traditional right off the bat with all sorts of pyramids and tosses. They close their performance with a banner displaying the words: "NU Spirit, NU Attitude, NU Breed." Okay then. While this is happening, a mysterious pair of hands appear on the foreground, applauding graciously.
Fun Fact: The Samsung dancers are wearing halter tops. That's all fine and dandy except that they're male.
Adamson Pep Squad (ADU)
The Skinny: After placing 2nd to perennial CDC title holder UP in 2001, the Adamson pep followed with a string of disappointing finishes the next few years with (4th being their highest in 2006 which was also the debut of their "carousel" toss) since then. Determined to reverse their fortunes, Adamson instigated a new rule that requires all members to have gymnastics know-how as well as getting their choreographer back. Sadly, Jojo Hate's services as a lucky charm, was not seeked.
Review: The pep squad are going for a Chun-li look it seems, although the implementation of their outfits is a little herky jerky with some having bangles on their shin which looks like a rape victim's knickers. Adamson is going straight to business, denouncing dances in favor of tumblings, pyramids, tosses and other formations I don't know what to call. That synchronized hadoken pose they did later confirms my suspicions that this is indeed Street Fighter influenced. I guess this is what you'd call a "flawless victory".
Fun Fact: During pre-routine introductions, Boom suddenly proclaimed his sudden craving for french fries and if his feeble attempts at bullying a teenager into surrendering her loot wasn't controversial enough, he can be seen sheepishly bending moments before cutting to Adamson's performance, eagerly reaching for a pile. Strange man, but persistent; you got to give him that.
Blue Babble Battalion (ADMU)
The Skinny: Long considered a traditional cheering squad that doesn't give a shit about the CDC, the Blue Babble Battalion has learned to embrace it after finishing 4th on 3 of the last 5 competitions. The BBB marked their change by going as far as to integrate the once-revolted canned music (and noon time dance show vignettes) on their halftime programs, a dramatic departure from the token infants and running time-defying acts expected from them.
Review: Keeping up with the transformation, the female BBB members are showing a lot more skin than usual, proudly flaunting their chiseled abdomens and miniscule body fat with hanging tops and low-rise pants, erasing the harsh memories of the lumbering cheerleader that haunted television viewers in 2004.
The BBB kick things off with traditional moves (and I had to Google this) like the "Bow-and-Arrow" and "Superman" then followed by a dance sequence conjuring visions of High School Musical. The male cheerdancers formed a straight line afterwards and started doing homo-erotic movements with one guy going so far as to hump the air violently. As the caption states: your guess is as good as mine.
Fun Fact: Kamae (not Portia) is wearing a BBB uniform.
UE Pep Squad (UE)
The Skinny: Favoring dance moves and guys making hand gestures to their crowd than challenging structural formations, UE is one of the CDC competitors that are severely handicapped by the new rule changes (that I only learned about when writing this piece) requiring more traditional moves. But if there's one thing UE is known for it's getting things done... no wait, that's the men's basketball side of things who unfortunately are also known for unceremoniously choking. Ah well, hopefully their squad shares the same positive traits.
Review: The opening act is actually quite interesting with their Samsung dancers performing different routines: one guy is doing capoeira while the other two are imitating an awfully drunk and incoherent yeti. The camera pans to the crowd and we get a rowdy group of fans happily waving their foam fingers. Now that's support!
The girls enter the arena with red and white umbrellas, each emblazoned with a single letter that form the word "WARRIORS" when they open it. Pyramids and mechanic tumbling ensues. When they retreat to the back, the members forgot to bring their umbrellas with them leaving a lone spotter to collect all 7. Poor guy.
Fun Fact: UE has an affinity for waitress-inspired costumes. Maybe they should stick to the Bioman blueprint?
After a series of delays, the board of judges finally announce the winners all of which I hastily chronicle in one retarded PNG:
As expected, the inter-web is in a state of disarray after the program concluded, as followers of the participating teams (with the obvious exception of the champion) go on a Mother Lily-esque violent tirade regarding the results. "Favoritism", "scripted", and "putangina luto" were the top 3 words of the day with "close this thread" not far behind.
Being impartial journalists, The 15th Parallel simply can't offer closure for it's legions of adoring readers (which last time we checked, was up to 9) but we'll say this: Frances Fleta deserved her award.
Mon, Sep 8, 2008 by Pandaemonaeon
A day after the scalper-ruined Ateneo/La Salle match-up (which was a huge letdown for the predominantly lopsided pace just as much as its lack of Georgina Wilson) we are treated to yet another scalper-ruined spectacle in the 2008 UAAP Cheerdance Competition. This event is notable for giving cheerdancers a platform to strut their wares and settle year-long disputes and insecurities as opposed to being relegated as mere morale boosters during halftime or in the piping hot bleachers.While the event existed as early as the mid-90s, it's only until 2000 when multinational company Nestle introduced the annual event to millions of viewers. Gigantic styrofoam ice cream cups and glittered letterings have been a staple on each school's performance at the behest of the sponsor's demand for the incorporation of products into their routine in a determined attempt to push the boundaries of overt advertising, a title that Solar has wrested since then with their unforgivable coverage of the recent Beijing Olympics.
After 8 years in the helm, Samsung got their turn and while many shuddered at the thought of carrying 3D cutouts of Plasma TV sets and refrigerators, the Korean consortium was a tad merciful deciding that a short, three-piece dance routine would suffice but at the price of adding extended segments such as a "Dream Team" and integration of Samsung and their respective slogans in the middle of random statements.
Being the perennial journalists that we are, securing tickets were of little problem to our team, allowing The 15th Parallel to successfully document the preceedings. Granted we were unable to bring our famed Nikon DLSR camera and silver-plated Manfrotto tripod (known as the 21st parallel) into the premises as a result of incompetent guards who were not the least bit familiar with our popular inter-web page but what ultimately matters is that we were able to cover it and that alone is a cause for jubilation!
The Animo Squad (DLSU)The Skinny: Eager to avenge their blunder from last year (which expectedly became an internet meme), the DLSU Pep Squad repackaged their roster as the "Animo Squad", incorporating members from separate dance guilds and retaining only 6 from their previous core as well as eschewing their trademark skimpy outfits in favor of an Ateneo-style preppy look. Will this change prove successful? They think so!
Review: The Animo Squad makes their way to the arena with oversized letters in tow. Unfortunately their dark green Bioman costume makes them a bit hard to see in the new Samsung-themed blue-colored matting. It appears that they forgot to send their Samsung dancers ahead either, who now awkwardly run in front but are promptly asked to depart. Things are not looking god for them. Thankfully, they only brought 4 letters.
Arrow formation, ice-skating pantomime spot, split-leg bunny hops, aerobic excercise, oh look they're doing the male pep squad floor humping too. We get some random shots of the DLSU crowd who are mostly disappointed; even the mom is clapping her balloons with the enthusiasm of a nauseated Somalian.
Fun Fact: Select portions of the Animo Squad's Bioman starter kit costume were colored white which makes those parts the only visible areas from afar because of the unintentional camouflage. Among the parts with such color scheme? The girl's crotches.
Salinggawi Dance Troupe (UST)The Skinny: Even if you don't care about cheerdancing, chances are you're well aware of UST's reputation in this field, usually by way of flame wars perpetuated by their following against the equally rabid supporters of UP, where they needlessly argue about who has the better pyramids and originality, which eventually segues into who produces better students and PACUCOA accreditation. Anyway, now where were we? Ah, the Salinggawi Dance Troupe. I heard they're great!
Review: A few basket tosses, rolling flips and the return of the matrix albeit in a shorter, less gimmicky way. This is followed by the female dancers falling into a supine position as their male counterparts sashay over and around them in quite possibly the most limpwristed sequence I've seen in a while. Whether or not the male cheerdancers are actually limpwristed is a different topic altogether.
Also worth mentioning was the huge UST banner they propped up in the middle of their routine that has a tiger head on top. But not just any tiger head; it's eyes light up! Impressive! If that pun was intentional, they get bonus points. If not, consider it an oversight.
Fun Fact: No Power Rangers outfit for UST this year, instead they took the NU halftime cheering squad costume and spruced it up. No shit.
UP Pep (UP)The Skinny: From one cheerdance competition juggernaut to another, the UP Pep Squad has been a constant in this field since it's inception, either winning the title itself or at worst, a top 3 finish. Like UST, they are also backed by a strong contingent willing to unleash a torrent of vitriol to anyone who dare malign their beloved squad who in case you're not aware, are capable of anything and everything from intricate tosses to walking on water. They're that damn good, or at least that's what they told me, and I'm inclined to agree since I'm afraid to be called names.
Review: The pep squad are wearing a really weird get-up. It looks like your typical rhythmic gymnastics full body stocking suit with a banana hammock and tattered skirt layer on top. If I have to make a comparison that makes sense it would be Robin wearing a skirt - literally. The men and women also sport mohawks and cropped do's respectively.
A few minutes into the contest and we have a ton of fuck-ups so far with most of their members unable to complete tosses and other sequences. In addition to the canned music, Benguet province post-rock sound clips also manages to find its way into their routine, keeping up with UP's consistent theme of being "artistic" that also hounded the smash-hit opening ceremonies. The performance is capped off by a flesh-colored undie-wearing guy doing the Oblation pose as indentations of his rib cage protrudes from his ample chest.
Fun Fact: UP Pep member Frances Fleta is the recipient of the "Samsung Stunner" award. While it does sound like a wrestling move, it's actually a special distinction and prize (what appears to be a Samsung F700) awarded to the best looking cheerdancer. Frances accepts the prize coyly, like a Japanese schoolgirl asking Michael Phelps for an autograph. Very cute, I must say.
The "Blazing Tamaraws" (FEU)The Skinny: After UST and UP, FEU is the only other squad seriously considered a threat to the "Big Two" which is quite unfair to the Morayta-based outfit considering that they've finished no worse than 3rd since it's inception. Nevertheless, with a whopping 17 rookies in their team this year, the odds are stacked against FEU although they're so confident they decided to brand this incarnation as the "Blazing Tamaraws". Sheer confidence or bats in the belfry insanity? You be the judge.
Review: The Tamaraws erect a spiffy-looking inferno backdrop from behind that are color-coordinated to their fiery outfits reminiscent of an anorexic Bam Bam Bigelow. They even have yellow red handkerchiefs; hopefully it creates the desired visual effect unlike in the UP opening when the "fire people" looked like bats more than anything. Speaking of UP, their guys are also sporting mohawks. Am I missing something?
Near the end of the routine, the Tamaraws pep squad unveil a banner that reads "Blazing Tamaraws" which coincide with the flame theme although I still have no idea what that has to do with a tamaraw or their school colors. Maybe a reference to the returning Mac Baracael who blazed quickly to recovery? Yeah, that sort of makes sense.
Fun Fact: FEU's courtside reporter had trouble keeping up with the "bad American accent" convention near the end of the program.
NU Bulldogs Pep (NU)The Skinny: The doormats of UAAP men's basketball continue the tradition even in the CDC, finishing dead last each and every year. The spin doctors claim that having an intact line-up (compared to last year when 7 members were rendered ineligible) and new coaching will be the wake up call that they sorely need, but The 15th Parallel disagrees. Our crystal ball tells us that the results will not be any different; the "crystal ball" being the live recording that is.
Review: Taking a page out of what made La Salle famous, NU opens with the "letter" routine (with opposite sides displaying NATIONAL and BULLDOGS respectively) and thankfully no one fucked up.
Like Adamson, they're also going for a no-nonsense approach, doing away with dancing and going traditional right off the bat with all sorts of pyramids and tosses. They close their performance with a banner displaying the words: "NU Spirit, NU Attitude, NU Breed." Okay then. While this is happening, a mysterious pair of hands appear on the foreground, applauding graciously.
Fun Fact: The Samsung dancers are wearing halter tops. That's all fine and dandy except that they're male.
Adamson Pep Squad (ADU)The Skinny: After placing 2nd to perennial CDC title holder UP in 2001, the Adamson pep followed with a string of disappointing finishes the next few years with (4th being their highest in 2006 which was also the debut of their "carousel" toss) since then. Determined to reverse their fortunes, Adamson instigated a new rule that requires all members to have gymnastics know-how as well as getting their choreographer back. Sadly, Jojo Hate's services as a lucky charm, was not seeked.
Review: The pep squad are going for a Chun-li look it seems, although the implementation of their outfits is a little herky jerky with some having bangles on their shin which looks like a rape victim's knickers. Adamson is going straight to business, denouncing dances in favor of tumblings, pyramids, tosses and other formations I don't know what to call. That synchronized hadoken pose they did later confirms my suspicions that this is indeed Street Fighter influenced. I guess this is what you'd call a "flawless victory".
Fun Fact: During pre-routine introductions, Boom suddenly proclaimed his sudden craving for french fries and if his feeble attempts at bullying a teenager into surrendering her loot wasn't controversial enough, he can be seen sheepishly bending moments before cutting to Adamson's performance, eagerly reaching for a pile. Strange man, but persistent; you got to give him that.
Blue Babble Battalion (ADMU)The Skinny: Long considered a traditional cheering squad that doesn't give a shit about the CDC, the Blue Babble Battalion has learned to embrace it after finishing 4th on 3 of the last 5 competitions. The BBB marked their change by going as far as to integrate the once-revolted canned music (and noon time dance show vignettes) on their halftime programs, a dramatic departure from the token infants and running time-defying acts expected from them.
Review: Keeping up with the transformation, the female BBB members are showing a lot more skin than usual, proudly flaunting their chiseled abdomens and miniscule body fat with hanging tops and low-rise pants, erasing the harsh memories of the lumbering cheerleader that haunted television viewers in 2004.
The BBB kick things off with traditional moves (and I had to Google this) like the "Bow-and-Arrow" and "Superman" then followed by a dance sequence conjuring visions of High School Musical. The male cheerdancers formed a straight line afterwards and started doing homo-erotic movements with one guy going so far as to hump the air violently. As the caption states: your guess is as good as mine.
Fun Fact: Kamae (not Portia) is wearing a BBB uniform.
UE Pep Squad (UE)The Skinny: Favoring dance moves and guys making hand gestures to their crowd than challenging structural formations, UE is one of the CDC competitors that are severely handicapped by the new rule changes (that I only learned about when writing this piece) requiring more traditional moves. But if there's one thing UE is known for it's getting things done... no wait, that's the men's basketball side of things who unfortunately are also known for unceremoniously choking. Ah well, hopefully their squad shares the same positive traits.
Review: The opening act is actually quite interesting with their Samsung dancers performing different routines: one guy is doing capoeira while the other two are imitating an awfully drunk and incoherent yeti. The camera pans to the crowd and we get a rowdy group of fans happily waving their foam fingers. Now that's support!
The girls enter the arena with red and white umbrellas, each emblazoned with a single letter that form the word "WARRIORS" when they open it. Pyramids and mechanic tumbling ensues. When they retreat to the back, the members forgot to bring their umbrellas with them leaving a lone spotter to collect all 7. Poor guy.
Fun Fact: UE has an affinity for waitress-inspired costumes. Maybe they should stick to the Bioman blueprint?
After a series of delays, the board of judges finally announce the winners all of which I hastily chronicle in one retarded PNG:
As expected, the inter-web is in a state of disarray after the program concluded, as followers of the participating teams (with the obvious exception of the champion) go on a Mother Lily-esque violent tirade regarding the results. "Favoritism", "scripted", and "putangina luto" were the top 3 words of the day with "close this thread" not far behind.
Being impartial journalists, The 15th Parallel simply can't offer closure for it's legions of adoring readers (which last time we checked, was up to 9) but we'll say this: Frances Fleta deserved her award.
Adamson is tops for degree of difficulty, but they botched some of the stunts. UP gets second plus props for the last-minute addition of the Oblation in the end.
For cleanliness of execution, FEU gets dibs. UST gets second for a 'safe' routine aka nothing extraordinary.
If there's a new rule asking the squads to have a traditional segment, shouldn't be DLSU and ADMU tops on this one or the two overemphasized on the dancing part and less on the cheer part?
Something's wrong with the world then.
For cleanliness of execution, FEU gets dibs. UST gets second for a 'safe' routine aka nothing extraordinary.
If there's a new rule asking the squads to have a traditional segment, shouldn't be DLSU and ADMU tops on this one or the two overemphasized on the dancing part and less on the cheer part?
Something's wrong with the world then.
So what do you think of the winnars and the what-ifs?
Adamson, IMO, got totally screwed in the butthole. They deserve a top 3 placing or a top 2.
Adamson, IMO, got totally screwed in the butthole. They deserve a top 3 placing or a top 2.
Copyright © The 15th Parallel
Comment: 3
As we can go on saying that La Salle and Ateneo can mop out the competition in a a traditional UAAP cheerleading contest, The Yellow Jackets CAN pull the rug under La Salle and Ateneo kung patigasan lang ng katawan ang laban.